Forgiveness During the Holidays: A Gift You Give Yourself!

This time of year is meant to feel magical and for many, it’s anything but calm.

There are schedules to juggle, traditions to uphold, kids to entertain, meals to plan, expectations to manage, and yes… sometimes an Elf on the Shelf that needs moving at midnight (although I have heard some parents really get into being creative and doing this). Add in any end of year work and gatherings with colleagues or family members where there may be unresolved tension, old wounds, or unspoken hurts, and suddenly the holidays can feel heavy.

That’s why a recent list of Principles of Forgiveness shared by Kyle Gray caught my attention. Not because forgiveness is easy but because it’s often misunderstood.

Forgiveness isn’t about excusing behavior.

It isn’t about pretending something didn’t hurt.

And it certainly isn’t about making someone else “right.”

Forgiveness is about freeing you.

Let’s explore what these principles can look like in real life, especially during this busy, emotionally charged season.

• Forgiveness Is Acceptance of Our Holiness

  When we forgive, we are choosing to remember who we truly are beneath stress, roles, and expectations. You are not just the planner, the peacemaker, the one holding everything together. You are a sacred being worthy of peace even when life feels messy.

  
  

• Forgiveness Is Remembering We Are All Equal

  That difficult coworker. That family member who pushes your buttons. That person who disappointed you. Forgiveness doesn’t mean you agree with them, it does mean you recognize they are human too, navigating their own wounds, fears, and conditioning. This awareness or shift doesn’t excuse their behavior but it releases your body and energy from staying in the fight or flight. An example, “They always do this to me” becomes “This is hard, and I don’t have to carry all of it”. 

  
  

• Forgiveness Honors the Divine in Others and Ourselves

  Sometimes we forget that honoring ourselves means releasing resentment that drains our energy. Forgiveness restores balance...not by changing the other person, but by returning your power to yourself.

  
  

• Forgiveness Is Stepping Back Into Your True Self

  The true you isn’t fueled by resentment or replaying old conversations. Your true self is grounded, intuitive, and whole. Forgiveness brings you back home to YOU.

  
  

• Forgiveness Lets Love Be Your Source of Power

  When we hold onto anger, it quietly consumes us and can literally eat us up. When we forgive, love becomes the strength that carries us forward...not weakness, but wisdom.

  
  

• Forgiveness Is a Welcome Home to Peace

  Peace doesn’t come from everything going perfectly at holiday gatherings. It comes from choosing inner harmony, even when outer circumstances are imperfect. Might I suggest putting your crystals and essential oils on and even doing a meditation before you need to walk into that gathering. If that is not your jam, then just breathe!

  
  

• Forgiveness Awakens Inner Vision

  When we release old stories, we begin to see clearly again...not through the lens of past hurts, but through compassion and clarity.

  
  

• Forgiveness Is a Celebration

  Energetically, forgiveness shifts everything. It’s like a weight lifting from your heart. No wonder Kyle says the angels dance because your soul remembers its lightness.

  
  

• Forgiveness Is Remembering Our Innocence

  Before the hurt, before the disappointment, there was innocence. Forgiveness reconnects us to that untouched part of ourselves that was never broken.

  
  

• Forgiveness Is Loving Ourselves Enough to Set Boundaries

  This is important: forgiveness does NOT mean tolerating bad behavior. You can forgive and still say “no more.” You can forgive and still choose distance. Forgiveness is internal freedom, not permission.

  
  

• Forgiveness Is When Someone Else’s Errors No Longer Control Your Happiness

  This is true liberation...when their words, choices, or actions no longer have power over your emotional state.

  
  

• Forgiveness Digests Toxicity and Initiates Healing

  Holding onto resentment is exhausting. Forgiveness allows the body, mind, and energy field to release what no longer serves, creating space for healing.

  
  

• Forgiveness Is Remembering You Were Never Truly Harmed at the Soul Level

  This doesn’t minimize pain, it reframes it. Your soul remains whole, untarnished, and intact, no matter what you’ve experienced.

 

A Gentle Reminder This Season

If you’re feeling stretched thin, emotionally raw, or triggered during the holidays, know this: forgiveness is not another thing to “do”  it’s a choice to soften.

It can be slow.

It can be layered.

It can begin with simply saying, “I’m willing.”

And most importantly, forgiveness is not for them.

It’s for your peace. Your body. Your heart. Your healing.

May this season offer you moments of grace and may forgiveness be one of the most loving gifts you give yourself. 💫  

Happy Holidays Everyone!